they just started talking about wanting to bang stephanie tanner from full house
So can I buy you a drink sometime?
Sure, but make it a double, I'm drinking for two these days.
they told me they were banning four lokos so yeah i did have to buy 42 of them
We're too lazy too send a pic of out balls. Just assume this is a pic of our balls and respond accordingly.
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
Smoked all day yesterday and even more today. Just survived high dinner with mom and sister. Thought I might eat the whole table
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
This family outing has commenced with me throwing up in an apple orchard
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
I didn't even know his name until he texted me the next day and told me I should take a plan B pill. Thanks Danny.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Left my house last night with a girlfriend, $200 in my wallet, and 10 finger nails. Came home with no girlfriend, an empty wallet, and 9 1/2 finger nails.
Yea, I had a bad night too aha
i couldn't be more explicit if i hit him upside the head with a dildo
I Never thought my late 30s would end up with me getting eaten out on a desk in the managers office of a lululemon, but I guess being a franchise owner has its perks!
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