Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
I just saw a pair of panties stretched over a fire hydrant on campus... I need to get the fuck out of this town
If i evwr doyble fist jack daniels and smirnoff again, i hereby give you permission to take them both away grom me and give me and give me a glass of wat
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
Btw. Made out with a random kid at a frat. It's all good though. He invited us to his frat party tomorrow so yay! For having plans!
he used the hotel microwave to cook the 16" pizza he bought at the walmart deli
He used a "food city great value" card to cut it
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
I refused to call him anything but Drake eyebrows all night.
I'm really ok with inappropriate relationships. They are my favorite of all the relationships. No need to be timid. For crying out loud.
She thinks you guys are the gods of the bathroom. If she runs past you naked, give me a heads up
Dude how much would someone have to pay you to get you to slide your vagina across a bald man's head because Honestly I'd do it for the experience alone. but money would be nice too\n\nI'm thinkin like 500 bucks. Maybe 700
Why are you like this.
ok morning sex is a totally valid reason to come in late... ur good, cya in 20
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