She has a t-rex face on a stuart little body.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
I need to stop sleeping with republicans and cowboys fans.
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
well you decided to make everyone "drinks" which was sprite and beer mixed.
You scratched my dick last night. It deserves an apology and I fell that actions speak louder than words when it comes to apologies like this.
I promise it'll work. Just go there and keep the lights off and keep saying blaowww. She'll think your me.
Having to explain to my dad why there are chicken wings to the pool filter, new low.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You were passed out in the OutBack Bowl Shrimp costume and when we asked you wtf happened you just said On Wisconsin.
How good was the sex? She sent me a fruit basket the next day.
Two of my dealers just made friends at this party. Do you think one will be pissed if I buy from the other or should I just go 50/50?
You're a wizard. You are a master of disguise. You are beautiful. I love you.
She's not allowed to do acid anymore... she started crying because she thought she was an eagle.
Was it a bad idea to have spent all of my tax return on coke?
Randomize