You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
well. it's seven AM and i'm too high to hula hoop.
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
he asked me to have sex with him by saying 'take one for the team'. so no we didn't do it.
New rule during sex: if it causes you to take your rings off, don't do it.
Protocol on turning down a date from someone in the House of Representatives?
so does the 200 for rent and 150 for utilities include the never telling my boyfriend about the guys i bring home.. or is that extra?
there's a barbecue in the shower. I'd like to know who got this to fit inside perfectly. impressive
You are literally throwing a tangerine right now. Beer pong is not played this way
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
It would be like a dance party with a dick inside you. I think that's what Ke$ha wants for the world.
She slapped me in the face with a McDouble. Just threw it right at my face while I was driving... That is why we can't bring her out in public.
Next year for Halloween you can be the sword swallower, with a penis shaped sword.
Don't do tequila. The Devil himself spits into shot glasses and we call it tequila. You will do bad things.
Randomize