we sat in the hammock and pretended we were skydiving for three hours. jack actually started crying when i convinced him his chute didnt open.
currently walking past a fire hyrdrant with a hose already attatched.. this could be dangerous..
a guy tried paying for lapdances with cds, who uses those anymore?
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
We broke up in downtown Nashville with drunken, blow up penis waving bachelorette parties walking by. For some reason I can see this ending up as a country music video.
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
Accidentally hit on the same girl twice at the bar, she give me her number both times though so I think its cool.
Is the booze for tonight or the apocalypse?
Both. Pregaming the zombie party and hurricane sustenance.
So after your set last night some 42 year old woman bought me a drink, professed her love for your music, and then made out with me last night because she thought I was you. Thank you.
It's like when your main girl and your side girl start having their period in the same week
You are the most depressed sports fan I know
Why are you taking pics in the bathroom with the plunger? I mean you still look hot and I'm totally going to wack off to it.
He gave me my financial savings if I invested with him while I was giving him a bj.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
They made the paper for stealing gnomes. I fucked a local celebrity.
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