The look your mother gives you when she sees you masterbating on web cam is unlike any I've seen before, but this is a case where, I would say, ignorance is bliss.
the amount of blow i got, New years should last a week.
We are not buying weed off a guy from the internet.
I peed glitter this morning and had a beard drawn on my face with eyeliner. Last time I do shots with gay Dan.
I'm in the city buying alcohol. I just got warned by a homeless man on the street that I shouldn't look so pretty "in these parts"
i feel we're the only people who'd use nyquil sexually
Stoned in some guys basement listening to ELO. it's like its 1978.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Well, if you're getting/have gotten your dick sucked, you're welcome. If not, I tried. Step up your game, pussy. I pulled a MacGuyver and got mine. No excuses bro.
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Man I was just the closest I've ever been to crapping my pants.
"We hooked up and in the morning he emailed me his mix tape"
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
yeah true but how easily can you rip a scrotum
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