Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
i didnt know what to say other then wrong hole.....after that the moment was ruined.
I got a handjob from a sober married woman in a parking lot in the middle of the day, yet you still cant manage to get laid by a drunk single slut at the bar at 1am. Wtf
when he was about to finish he told me to avert my eyes and keep my lady parts away. chivalry isnt dead.
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Nice just gets you lonely or dead. I don't like those options.
I just saw a herd of slutty loofahs run down the street...
OH MY GOD! I CAN FEEL A PULSE IN MY BALLS IT HURTS! ITS LIKE MINI FEMINIST NINJAS ARE ATTACKING MY BALLS!!!
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
Literally every boy I've dated is now in a somewhat successful band. My vagina has obviously been blessed by the rock gods.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
That's how pantless uber rides happen
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
This is either going to be a hilarious catfish or the fuck trophy of the century.
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
