In similar news, my cock is bigger than the plane that landed in the hudson.
man i wonder what i would be like if i had never started smoking weed
How long is it safe to eat only Hot Pockets and Popsicles?
It's a good deal. He teaches me how to longboard, then we have sex
My nipple rings set off the metal detector at the courthouse this morning.
I've been practicing for you. Including stockpiling medical supplies for curing hangovers.
We were naked in bed for hours and we didn't have sex. Either he's gay or he wants to respect me. Neither of which I approve of.
there's a drunk hobo under the bridge wearing a jester hat and screaming at women
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
And my parents said I crawled through the house
If Plan B had a rewards card I would have earned so many free tote bags by now
Guys are like someone else's baby; i'll play with them but if responsibility is involved i'll hand them off.
he was wearing pj pants, thank you for not letting me go home with him
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
Julius Caesar had a huge penis
WTF are you reading?
Ha ha! No, the guy in the Caesar costume last night. We hooked up. His dick was huge
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