just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
That girl gave me her number because you were arrested. I am so proud of you dude.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
Eric and I just went in the hallway to practice our new handshake in a real life situation at live speeds. That high.
I'm so fucking horny right now If I blink I might cum
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
this is a save-me-from-tijuana-tequila-and-hoookers booty call. if i don't hear from you by 8pm i'm grabbing my passport
if i'm not back tomorrow call the embassy
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
You think I could convince him that having sex with another girl isn't cheating?
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
