Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
So I'm driving and this guy next to me at the stop light is reving his engine and honking at me. Motherfucker thinks that's because I'm asian and drive a honda I'm automatically going to race him
I found a girl on our couch wearing lederhosen this mornig... I dont know if i should be impressed or ashamed
If she wants to think that freshman 15 means sleeping with 15 guys than so be it I just gotta make sure I'm one of them.
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
She liked to slap me in the face while she was on top. All I can say is that big boobs can excuse a lot.
me blowing you awake is the exact turn i want our relationship to take
Well you tried to pay for a drink with your keys for one...
Just had the best idea EVER: start a mead brewing/dispensery business! WE CAN BREW IT IN MY GIANT CLOSET, AND NEVER BE SOBER AGAIN.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
It felt like a sumo wrestler slapped me. With a wet hand. 8 times in a row.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
You were holding onto her boobs like you were adrift at sea and they were the only flotation devices
While finding our clothes afterwards he says..."So do we like have to talk after this?"
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