Shit chicky whatchu wearin rt now, ur skins?
Oh dear, kinda... in ur sweats!
U look good, r we getting naked in ur car?
Let's just say there is a bloody hand print above my bed and it's not mine. Literally.
So I pulled my t-shirt down, pushed my boobs up and marched right into that church!
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
I was doing the dishes wondering what was with all the tiny little cups, but then I remembered that some people drink things other than huge mixed drinks and big cups of water the next day.
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
He blew a load on his roommates pillow just to piss him off. Why did you introduce me to these people?
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
Im going..... Drinking all day and hand jobs from 18yr old emo rich girls that are just trying to get back at mom and dad for being to protective...SOLD
please come upstairs a drunk asian is lying down n the middle of my room and i don't know him
I'm shoveling snow with a camel-pack full of beer in a blizzard. I love snow days as an adult!!!
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
What's rude is him not accepting my blowjob offer. What kind of guy denies that.
Wine. Check.\nDino chicken nuggets. Check.\n#IssaParty
Rationing the toilet paper. Only one wipe allowed. I'm scared to move too much.
Randomize