I wish my penis had an off switch
Anything crazier than usual happen? I woke up in a stairway with my cock out.
looks like were buying each other an abortion for our one year present...
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
once she started licking the door on the stall, i got out of there and told her bf "this is your problem now" and walked away
she played "i just wanna get married" by jagged edge while we were having sex. why cant i avoid stage 5 clingers
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
Just realized the guy is in my class. Unless there's another guy that had half his ear bit off at a St. Patty's party
I woke up to a hotel manager knocking on my car ( window was down) and asking if I was ok
Moral of the story: don't have drunken shower sex with the lights off...or you WILL break your foot. And the shower knobs.
So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea
At this point I think you're just judging my taste in men
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
He showed his fake to the cop and was like "does the coloring look off to you?"
Who fucking spams baby shark at a sports bar
Randomize
