a strip club that doesn't allow touching or asking for sex... whats the point?
unless her vagina can tell me my horoscope in sign language, I'm not going.
Married on the beach in PCB while blackout drunk. Bonged beers on the sandbar for a bachelor party. They shotgunned beers at the end of the vows. How is spring break allowed to happen?
i lose more brain cells when ever she opens her mouth then i would doing meth for 8 years of my life.
Well, i'm not sure how that works so i wish both you and your vagina luck on your voyage.
Recently successful and happy relationships are at an all time high now that you are no longer fucking so many peoples girlfriends. You alone have changed the mating patterns in the lower half of our county.
You need to stop relating my life to your schoolwork. But tell my girlfriend that she'd be proud.
Once you've seen a girl stick a snake in her snatch normal stuff seems like Barney and friends
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
Ahh, 151. Think of it this way: it took one shot to get you buzzed, I took eight. I may or may not have broken a tv with my skull that night and met someone's parents naked and hungover the next morning.
Best feedback on my performance so far: "There are things that can't be unseen."
I had sex on a dinosaur comforter, tell me that does not define my life.
Do you know how hard it is to be while you're high with a chuck Norris poster in the bathroom?
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
He told me to leave him behind and bury him in his batman pajamas. So two lessons I guess, don't give Tom whiskey and don't touch his daddy issues with a twenty nine and a half foot pole.
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
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