would you consider dating someone with braces an investment?
her name is jenna, so i wanna cunt punt her
that's how i am about ashleys and britneys
If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
You are an asshole
haha sleeping beauty awakes.
Where did you find this costume?
Just found my toeprints on the glass of his sunroof.
he told me he expects me to keep the fangs on when i go down on him. presumptuous, yes, but man after my own heart.
At this point, I really just need a sign in sheet for my vagina.
Do ex girlfriends even count for summer sexcapades. Seems like the damage had already been done
Victory lap
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Still at home. Videotaping hamsters.
She licked my face when I was on the phone with a customer and I just laughed. Im not sure if thats good or bad
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
the person she was housesitting for had a christmas card from charlie sheen on the fridge so we fucked on the couch and just slept in the bed
Randomize
