last night i used 411 to try and contact britney spears.
dollar well spent
I think horse shit smells the best of all shits.
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
there comes a time in a mans life when you ask yourself, will i fake love for blowjobs? and the answer is always yes
Accidentally just signed something at work 'lotus flower' I need to keep my stripper life separate from real life.
So I came home baked last night and made about 60% of my jeans into jorts...
The pine trees are waving at me.
Put the pipe down honey.
Hi trees.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
My coke dealer 411'd my work number just to see how I was doing and gave me his new number. He must miss my business
I don't care if we have to swim home from the bar, Im not gonna sit home in the dark and read some fucking book
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
Come to the roof. We are drinking breakfast.
I am an advanced cybernetic robot sent back in time to 2013 to fuck my wife senseless for hours on end. Have you seen this wife?
Eddy, if you don't want to roll play then say so. This is just obnoxious
I deflowered you on valentines day. I AM THE BEST AT ROMANCE. LOVE ME.
I like to listen to classical music when I eat taco bell. I think it cancels out the aura of poverty and desperation.
Randomize
