She says ass holes are for stuffing, the verb, not stuffing, the noun.
I'm sitting the next couple hours out. Puking in a potted plant really put shit into perspective for me.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
So for future reference.... it's a little unnerving when I can't get hold of you, and the last communication we had was, "Oh fuck... It's tequila"
My underwear are in the stairs so apparently I did take the dog out.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Why did you just send me a picture of your dinner?
CAUSE LOOK HOW MUCH SPAGHETTI I'M EATING
Just checked in with my friend who walked in on us. He thinks you two had a spiritual connection and he's bugging out
He was also rolling face on molly so his perception of divinity might be slightly off
I have a 30 pack and enough condoms to last until tomorrow morning. Have Mystery Science Theater 3000 ready. I'm on my way over.
I thought I was bad, the girl next to me on the bench was feeding a bush a hamburger and introduced me. Only at lollapalooza.
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
You should frame my arrest warrant.
OMG he dropped his pants for me. Granted it was to show me where he got stabbed but still...
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize