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: I need to find myself a plastic surgeon husband so i can get boobs.
but u need boobs to get one in the first place.
He just said "I made some changes in my life. The male g-spot is in the rectum and I wanted to explore that."
I'm 99% sure I high fived a girl over mashed potatoes last night
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
Tell them you aren't trying to make money, you are just the mr rogers of weed,its such a good feeling a very good feeling the feeling you know that were friends
Only sluts go out in this weather carpe diem boys
Crazy fun. I think I got a concussion from a stripper
The zoom feature on snap chat videos is the worst thing to ever happen to sexting
You know it's really hard to draft fantasy football players in a crowded bar when I have a raging hard on
sex on a roof was cool and all but that superhero argument was the best part of the night hands down
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
Things could not have gone more poorly if I had stripped naked and run through the Sahara with sirloins tied to my vagina.
why the hell are you crying over taco bell?
Randomize
