bad decision 37: pregaming the antique store
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
This is irresponsible on your part, leaving me alone in a bar.
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
But I did spend part of my morning scrubbing your cum off my grandmothers piano.
Watching my ex make out with another girl is weird.
But she's wearing a jumpsuit so I feel better.
Panda onesie. Pizza. Netflix. Wrapped up like a burrito. Screw you guys and your cute relationships THIS IS WHAT INFINITE HAPPINESS TASTES LIKE
"This is Emily. She likes potatoes. And sometimes laughs and cries at the same time, and has a wonderful butt"
Waffles and pussy, what else is there?
Some nights you just end up digging your mcdouble out of the trash and eating it. it happens.
I just sent a dick pic to a number on Craigslist, this may be my new low
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I was grinding on my boss last night. So Monday will be fun. That's what's going on in my life right now.
Randomize
