then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
can we get nightvision for the apartment?
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
i'm not sure what happened. i know i woke up on the floor of his bathroom, then had morning sex with him. dont remember getting to his apt. dont remember much.
morning sex?... maybe not a total mistake then? he seems like a normal person, so rare at BU
oh no, he's far from normal. i know his high school girlfriend. she's CRAZY. and he definitely deals prescription drugs. also. he had sex with me even though i slept on his bathroom floor.
to cover up your slurred speech you tried talking like the creepy old man from family guy
I don't even want to think what you did to boys being that drunk and horny.
Then I wouldn't suggest looking at the pictures from last night.
that's what penises do
they tell lies.
I always knew I'd be the first one with an STD
I think I have to break up with him. I just cried, not moaned, screamed, etc, cried, with tears of sadness and disappointment when I came.
My wife climbed on top of me, fucked my brains out, and gave me money from the ATM. I'm living the dream.
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
But lunch with my dad really just means an hour and a half of him telling me how he's disappointed and how he knows I'm on drugs
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
i just got drunk and created an entire Dr Seuss unit for my first graders.
Randomize
