i blew a .213 what kind of thug blows the compton area code exactly? this guy
The brown eye won't let me do that either.
oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
And the best part is that she's coming home to find that I completely shaved her dog.
It's official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world.
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
Not too bad but came home early cuz business was shut down due to an employee sexually harrassing the inspector
And the view of you in reverse cowgirl is arguably the most spectacular view ever... And I've seen the Eiffle tower, the colosseum, mountains of Hawaii, Michaelangelo's David, and the Mona Goddamn Lisa. Just saying.
I flashed my cleaning lady and don't remember who I went on a date with. I know who I woke up with though, that counts right?
You peed all over his floor and had a bottle popped in your ass when you passed out. Don't tell me I'm "still living in my college days"
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
Lesson Learned: It's not a party until someone pisses their pants.
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