Bret has after-school detention for writing Brianna has a stinky vag on the ground at recess.
WHOA. WHOA. WTF. WHOA. TOO HIGH FOR HIM TO BE ENGAGED RIGHT NOW.
He was taking the caps off the vodka bottles and throwing them out the window so we'd have to finish them. Engineers have the best logic.
I do. There's a bald headed guy whose kinda hot. I might rub his head. I've only had 2 beers
got woken up at 7:30 by a drunk girl asking me where she was... apparently she slept on my futon
she was in a cheetah costume
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
We boned on a bench in a park, french people were walking by cheering us on. Totally acceptable
By the taste of his semen he isnt vegetarian and therefore lied to me to take me home on a brighter note i stole his fondue set
"I'm in the bathroom. Only place I can sit and relax without that girl trying to give me a lap dance."
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
He also wore a doorag last night so i had to swipe left.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
also. got fucked to usher last night. dunno if thats a new high or a new low
Was it at least a good usher song?
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
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