I took shrooms, thc and molly but its okay i'm surrounded by freaks
Ross. Joey. Chandler. Who would you do?
so my 6 year old came home from school and asked me if he was a bastard cause the kids at school called him one, i told him to call them a clit. those parents will hate me
I think we should make Neil Patrick Harris a permanent part of our role playing.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
He had me saved in his phone as "Dick Socket". Lets see if I ever fuck him in a bathroom again.
I heard liver failure is in for 2012 anyways
My sister hid me from my parents, brought me a bloody mary, and told my girlfriend I was out with my dad. For 13, I got to say she's working out pretty good.
I'll be so proud. Like a proud mama bear freeing my slut cub into the wild.
Well at one point he got ahold of my archery gear.. And I. Shit. You. Not. Sarah took an arrow to the knee.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
Yes. I will keep putting the beer into my stomach and eventually the bartender will make a mistake
i sent my dealer a picture of the money i would pay him. i also told him i would pay him in cheez-its if he would prefer that.
I bought a mink out of the back of some guy's van on my walk home from the bar yesterday
Never. No amount of alcohol could convince my brain and eye sight that it is okay to fuck him. I'd rather fuck my cousin.
Randomize
