dude, you're being a jerk.
sorry, didn't mean to pull a Cheney
Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
It's not called being bisexual its called making out with anyone that has a mouth
I just want you to know if you wake up tomorrow morning and wreak of mustard, I was not involved.
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
The kid in the park, who was on a leash I might add, looked at us and yelled "stranger danger" before hiding behind his dad
I didn't notice because vodka
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
WHAT KIND OF GUY JACKS OFF TO A PICTURE OF A BUTT WHAT IS THIS THE 1980s
my mom snuck into my room, washed her clothes and made her breakfast. what the fuck she's a better boyfriend than I am
so let me get this straight... she's showing a cameltoe that can be seen from the space station and I'm NOT supposed to stare?
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Of course I'm going to see her again. She had waterproof handcuffs in her shower.
Sorry dude, one minute I was flirting with a bachelorette party from Dallas and the next I’m being tied to the bed by the bride
Trying to wrangle us an invite to the wedding
Randomize
