he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
idk if you're aware of this...but we could potentially have the greatest hate sex...ever.
Leave it to him to get us kicked out of a bar for hitting on an 80 year old woman. I want to be that wasted one day.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
I did something similar high once. I stopped like 30 feet in front of a stop sign because I felt like it was running towards me and I started crying. Got out my car and hugged it and told it not to run away people need it.
You asked me to pick a color between pink and purple, and I said orange; you told me, "okay, that's a truth question". Then you asked if I had ever deep-throated a cupcake...I didn't even know what to say.
Totally forgot I asked the cop for a theoretical fist bump and he still let me drive away
I'm going back to his house to watch wreck it Ralp.
Hey, Monsters Inc. got me laid. Disney man, who knew it leads to sex.
My Midnight Kiss was a Big Mac.. Happy New Year
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
she just sent our roommates a message asking them for a parakeet. are you gonna call later?
There were no words. I got in his car, took my pants off, threw my shirt out the window, and got things started. After we were done I collected my clothes, gave him a kiss, and crept back into my house.
You're like the sex ninja. How doesn't he love you?!
Just because you haven’t had your UTI yet doesn’t mean you have a right to talk like Yoda
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
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