were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
I swear my cock just shook it's head disapprovingly at me.
she took out her dip, threw up, and put it back in. it was like a scene from Nick and Nora's trip to the trailer park.
Someone in my class is wearing shirt and on the back it says...National Bible Quiz Finalist 2006. Do you really expect me to find a guy here
i just saw the eighteen different ways i could die and only after that did i realize i'd made a poor decision
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
We were fucking at break-dick speeds.
remind to leave next time the words "tequila" and "challenge" are shouted
We're gona eat taco bell and then take exlax and see who can hold it in the longest. Loser has to pay for drinks all weekend. You in?
Right now Tom has the 2nd floor office bathroom under siege. He shit/clogged one toilet, and he's throwing up in the sink.
Best line overheard at the bar: "This is the last time I'm shaving my ass for him...I mean we just broke up".
My name will be tattooed on his ass by sunday.
I sharted in my christmas pjs :(
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
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