just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
$3 wine plus diet sprite does not make good champagne.
does taste better than andre tho
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
i think you walked me home, then i felt bad for putting you through the trouble so i walked you home...i'm not sure how i got home after that.
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
My dealer threw in a "freestyle rap" today with my purchase. I dont know if I can handle this relationship.
Just because its your birthday does not mean u can play quarters by dropping quarters into cups to make me drink.
sitting in the bathroom telling some girl to keep puking or she will die. while holding a beer. nursing school rocks.
She had me dip my balls in cake batter ice cream from cold stone and then tea bag her. Let's get weird just got a whole new meaning.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
The only people in the library at 5:00 on the friday after finals are homeless or pre-med.
I will be single by the day my lease is up (234 days). Plan accordingly.
Who the fuck hid 3 Zimas under my pillow?! Icing doesn't count when it's 8am the next morning and everyone's left and you've passed out on your couch. Currently chugging 2 of 3...
My history professo slid into my DMs. Granted I did give him “fuck me” eyes during a lecture a few times.
Randomize
