worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
The football player sitting in front of me just googled himself. Only 4 articles came up. That's why he plays at Utah State.
The plants looked thirsty. Growing plants need mimosas too.
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
How much is that going to cost?
A lot of beer.
He got completely naked and is now just standee there next to my bed poking at my hamster. Why can't I get sex the normal way.
It was his first time doing shrooms and we made him ride in the truck bed. But he kept standing up and yelling when we stopped so we had to keep driving
I hope your fat roommate breaks the bunkbed and crushes you in your sleep
Came back with a random sweatshirt, an American flag, and a for sale sign. Mission success?
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
He was on my bed looking at me like a sacrifice to the gods of gay sex and he's definitely a bottom. Like Jesus Christ a really, really great ass of a bottom.
Talk about having your cake and eating it he has basically demolished the whole fucking bakery
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
Shower wine is way better than shower beer.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
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