we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
I love being friends with rich people. I get laid by association.
I misunderstood what a threesome is. Please come pick me up.
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
she was passed out on the moving sidewalks in the airport, we NEED to travel more often
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
He sent me a picture of him bent over showing his asshole with the caption "vwahla".... No more tequila for either of you
puking in a sink with a garbage disposal Fucking. Rules. It's like you're punishing your puke when you're done.
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
Thanks for duct tapping my dick to my leg while I was passed out. I could only aim straight down. I stood on your bed. Have a nice day at work!
Taking a walk while tripping face during Halloween time was a bad idea. I started crying bc I was so scared and hide in the parks playground.
Got electrocuted a second ago, is it weird that I have a boner?
I can’t tonight. I’ve got to see about a penis
Are you hungover?
No. I'm hiding under my covers and hoping it doesn't find me.
Randomize
