he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
watching a tv show about cocaine.. just explained to my mom why the test monkey chose coke over food
My vagina makes bad decisions like its her job
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
Yes, I have your ice luge mold. I'll do a prisoner exchange for the beer bong
Yeah I'm at work. Nothing like the threat of blowing chunks on passing cars to make you feel alive.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I cannot describe the pre-ejaculative horrors thru the medium of text messaging
I woke up today in my boxers hugging a log and realized that I think I've gotten close enough to nature. I really need to stop doing shrooms with you
He wanted me to come over on Christmas...inviting your fuck buddy over for the holidays is just something you don't do.
An d I'd rather cry while putting a waffle in my mouth than cry on my pillow, ya feel me?
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Randomize
