five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
There are lots of gay asians. This is better than i was expecting
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
Trust me man, I did not put any cookies down your pants when you slept.
so i guess now we know you can get away with peeing mere feet from the Capitol if you shout IM PREGNANT at the guards
I'd like to believe that in some alternate universe we are living this wonderful lesbian life together..
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I woke up naked and you weren't here. What a relief.
You kept yelling stranger danger at Nick because he was talking to that girl you didn't like. Your not invited ever again.
It was rocky mountain showdown of course we got shitfaced and talked about eating buffaloes
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
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