So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
how are you gonna miss the world cup? other than the olympics it's our last way to assert our dominance over China after this economic bull shit
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
Dude, all I remember was you grabbing random girls, yelling "It's a rap video!" and pouring high-life on them.
my post shower fart this morning sounded like hulk ripping through a phonebook
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I just audibly asked myself if i wanted to masturbate.
And then audibly agreed
I still regret not being there for your blackout into the dumpster last year
Maybe I can find a straight girl rehab camp, like the opposite of those degaying camps, where they teach me how to love the ladies instead
Omg. I would pay ALL OF THE MONEY for that camp.
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
did you just send me my own nude
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
I didn't have any lime for my chaser.. so after my shot I ate a handful of lime flavored chips. Didn't work so great.
Randomize
