then she said "on the count of three I think we should apologize to eachother"
We're too lazy to do dishes, so we're making sangria in a flower vase.
drunken yoga. on the beach. senior week. you have been chosen <3
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Want a slice of this weekend's hottest piece of ass?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
Went outside and he was playing rock paper scissors with a cop over a drunk in public ticket.
We ended up at an Asian frat. I made out with two Mexicans at the same time and I pulled a muscle in my leg from twerking too low. Diversity.
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
Don't worry you weren't as drunk as you thought. You only fell 4 times.
Hmm, peanut butter and Xanax. Next Ben and Jerry's flavor.
I have jury duty tomorrow
I almost deep fried my finger today and yet I think you are worse off than I am.
He unliked all of my pictures on instagram, I don't know whats worse, the fact that he did it or the fact that I noticed..
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
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