He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Oh and apparently TSA has to open your present from my family or the terrorists win
Hands down, the girl passed out in the bathroom was the best looking. Concious or not.
I miss vodka workout Fridays
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
She broke up with him yesterday after she cheated on him. He's going a bachelor party next weekend. How has Homeland Security not raised the threat level?
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
Exactly, finding that perfect flask to come with you on all your adventures is like finding the perfect wedding dress. You have to feel it.
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
A cute girl just told me she forgot to take her birth control and winked... I've never been so conflicted about fleeing in terror
I climbed through his window to find him already with another booty call. This wouldn't have happened if I could upgrade from my 7th grade scooter to a real car.
…If I were you I wouldn't use that as part of your argument to your dad for a car
Randomize
