as evidence of my kitchen this morning my night involved alot of mustard and condoms
Wednesdays are like the thursdays of tuesdays... Drink time
I was told u were the one who could explain to me why i woke up in the running shower, still in my dress and heels
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
I'll see your cousin, and raise you a sister.
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
You christened everyone with a powdered doughnut and then tried to absorb vodka with your nipple.
Operation: pick up a lawyer was a resounding success. Commence operation: football mugshot weekend
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
He has what he calls a "Ben Franklin". It's a pubic hairdo based on the man himself; long on the sides and bald in the middle.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
He took some pill and now he's on all fours demanding we give him chips from the dog bowl. Come get him.
You talk the same way I hallucinate.
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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