is it bad that i kinda- ok, reallyyy don't remember having sex with him last night?
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
And secondly i just said i'd pay ten dollars to have sex with you
just had dinner with my dad's new gf and her daughter.. had to drink a beer to get through it.. she's 19 she has on a disney watch and snowflake earrings
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
How many stacks you been grindin gangsta?
omg mom no
It's so blood brotha crip what be good
Had a dream I beat up niall then madeout with him while snorting coke out of a dragons egg
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
The uberlube is also flammable
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
..needless to say, i got fired. But I'm in the parking lot tanning on top of your car... so its not all bad.
Remembering you have vodka in the freezer gives the same surge of happiness as finding 20 bucks in a coat pocket.
Randomize
