Did you know that cab drivers don't take quarters for payment? They don't even like it when you ask.
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
Are you asking me on a date where we get shithoused and do some fingerpainting?
Still burping lighter fluid. Totally awful.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
and ive been naked for the greater part of the evening. alone, drunk, and naked. i think that is how all great interventions start.
I saw a guy do a line this morning in line to start the 5k, happy thanksgiving!
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Just landed in Atlanta. Still drunk. I can't feel my face
You asked him if he would have sex with you under the dinosaur. He declined and then you started crying, blaming the sand.
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
I just recommended that the library purchase the first major hentai with tentacle porn. Really, I'm doing everyone a favor.
Randomize
