I don't apprectiate you insinuating that my breasts have a sort of bremuda triangle effect
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
remember last year when i left for the bar in flip flops and came back in heels?
it happened again.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
How was the rest of your night?
A little fuzzy and a lot naked.
I got really high and googled the history of Amish people for like an hour.
She's posted my bail. Twice. Of course I'm going to be her wing girl.
It really does creep me out though that the next ten years will involve my friends creating smaller versions of themselves because to be honest I don't know how much I like some of them. So that thought it really scary
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
The sex definitely would have been a perk. But not sitting in a ditch was what I was going for...
he was peeing off the deck shouting "urinals are for pussies" that's how much hurricane.
I guess she found the pillow case full of vomit I hid last night: "Oh my God. Oh my God. In my fucking FRIDGE?! Really? Hope your dick falls off there's puke all over my food. Fucking die."
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
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