Canada: barely better than America at a sport they invented.
how can i incorporate a boy scout uniform into what i do tonight?
I love having a vagina, its like having the keys to a city
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
I just dropped off shoes at Mike's hotel. The chick he hooked up with last night stole his phone and shoes.
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
The moral of the story is do not hire me because everything will end up smelling like pickles and I will not sufficiently clean it up.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
This is worse then when all the pharmacists sang me happy birthday while I was buying plan b
Not as awesome as someone telling you that you have the biggest tits they've ever seen. And they're like 30-something, so they've seen a decent amount of tits in their lifetime.
I love when groups of boys part so I can walk through. It's like a red sea of penises, and I am their Moses.
He was stoned laying on my bed singing I'm a little tea cup while I took a pregnancy test. Thank god it was negative.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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