Like worst hickies ever he always gives them like wtf
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
Just got my period. I'm not pregnant with Scott's child and I won't be having any sex tonight. This must be what they mean by bittersweet.
Yea i'm supposed to have jury duty on monday. Hope they don't mind me still being drunk.
Na you can't get charged for public intoxication unless you're outside. I checked.
Been home for 3 days and already spiked coffee with Kahlua. Only 106 till we go back to school
Ever have a day where u just waNna wake up get a blow job eat food and chill I just want today to be that day
My picture of a beer can in a McDonalds cup full of ice got more likes than my relationship with her. Is beer THAT much better than monogamy?
i'm taking a spore imprint of the mushroom we found growing in our bathroom and sending a picture to ryan. he will then be able to tell if it's trip-worthy
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
in that moment our bushes were one. and in that moment we were pure.
You can't talk like Dr. Evil to me five minutes after the greatest orgasm of my life.
Concept: I never actually flirt with anyone, I'm just a bitch and some people find it endearing
Totally reading about penis envy for my final exam
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
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