So my mouth tastes like dick. Does that explain how our talk went?
what did gay clubs do before lady gaga
ya i looked horrible drunk and pregnant isn't a good combination
I wonder if that one guy remembers you sticking salami to his forehead when he was passed out on new years eve.
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
I cant feel my face. Like I dont even know if I have one. I wish I had a helmet
Woke up this morning with seven juice boxes under my pillow and an empty box of condoms In my pocket. Good night.
NO. ANAL IS NOT A GAME.
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Hey, you can't rush the perfect creeper shot. I need buffer time to hone my skills.
Then that is decided. Fuck away my little bunny rabbit.
I've been smoking weed using candles all week and I just found a lighter. This may truly be the happiest moment of my life. It's embarrassing how excited I got
We fucked so hard and loud that the everyone at the party downstairs starting chanting his name. Oh I we broke a lamp.
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
He burst in the bathroom while I was peeing to hand me my beer I was looking for earlier tht night. And my pants were already down so I thought why not
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