so i woke up thsi morning with a phadora on my head, no shirt and a huge hangover? want to help me figure this out?
You stuck the head of a rubber chicken you found in her house up your ass and then started running around her living room. Naked.
you want my honest opinion? I'm sure refering to her vagina as the "bat cave" was your first mistake.
So you honestly dont remember putting honey in your bong? You kept talking about how you wanted to become a bee and fly
you kept making us tell you how cute you looked in your new outfit, even after you threw up all over it
She just drank the vanilla extract. Again. AGAIN. No one should be that eager to get drunk.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
Waking up next to a 3 inch puddle of water in my kitchen with a bathing suit on...what the fuck went on lastnight
Scratch one off the douchebag bucket list. Just saw a guy in a sesame street tshirt and a tap out hat. Didn't get the memo that big bird's trying to get into mma.
Didn't know hookah bars could end badly. I feel for her hair
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
it was so good i reconsidered my staunch atheism
I don't know if the fact that I carry lube in my purse means I'm living life right or I'm doing it wrong..
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
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