Jason just peed on the potty all by himself!!
"omg awesome!, you do realize we aren't together anymore"
i wonder how he feels talking to my mother about jesus with a condom on his dick
so later when i'm crying over him remind me that he once called his penis "senor weeper"
we just toasted to your mouth on alex's balls at the bar
pretty sure i had my hand down BOTH their pants at the same time at some point...
My penis has a 100% approval rating. He has never received a formal complaint. If you'd like to file one, you can go fuck yourself.
she brought my homemade cookies with condoms taped to the box... im in love
When the cop tells you to leave the pool, does that mean you have to put your bathing suit back on too?
I don't send those kind of pictures unless the recipient has already been up close and personal with it. I don't give previews, but I will provide recaps.
What's Spanish for "I shouldn't have worn these underwear to work?"
I need to sleep so I can die properly tomorrow.
So woke up naked and found my clothes from last night in my kitchen with a half eaten quesadilla
You were staring right at you dick at the urinals, then looked at all the other guys dicks and fist pumped saying "I win!"
This is very awkward but where is my dildo, Mom
Stereotypically, lax bros last the longest, but have huge egos that are annoying. Baseball players barely last 10mins, but are really nice. And than we have soccer players, last long and have no egos. Me and my friends have collected our findings.
Randomize
