Sex don't cost a thang now that you can buy trojans with meal points.
Awkward is getting caught beating off in the company bathroom...
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
hey you didnt make it to our afterparty what happened?
Ran around with a boom box broke a trampoline float, had a girl lick my ear the usual
So the bros are yelling at another bro to get that dildo off the roof. And there is indeed a dildo looking object on the roof.
I'm not sure if it was sex or spear fishing. He goes in for it like he's crash landing a rocket
I miss the days of selfishly blowing a load in the condom without her knowing and acting all like "we shouldn't do this" so she would get dressed and leave.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Did copperhead road at the bar. All the girl next to me did was stare at my glorious bouncing tits. CAN I FUCKING HELP YOU?? I worked hard for these tits.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
I fucking hate humanity. I met a twenty three year old adult with an aol email account today. I'm not sure how those things are related, but I'm sure they are.
Wait... why were you finger painting at one in the morning?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
first he passed out on the toilet...then hugged it and screamed no no no as i tried to pull him out
Randomize
