My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
I GPSed you we're an hour and 14min away from each other
and it's going to stay that way
About tomorrow. if it dosent fit dont force it. Just pushit as far as you can and i'll wiggle the rest of the way
I admire the strength of friendship we have that allows for sharing husbands.
I cant watch the real world now after jersey shore. its like trying to go back to vagina once uve had anal
you just kept swimming in circles and whenever someone would try and coax you out you would scream "i CANNOT drown, my brother is the supervisor of a water park!!
Just saw an old lady vomit in a trash can at the airport. I instinctively called her a pussy. College has ruined us.
She liked every single Facebook status in her newsfeed and then made her status 'I LIKE U GUYS'
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
whoever put homecoming and halloween on the same weekend owes me a new liver and a get out of jail free card.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
You stood outside his house all night throwing your sister's leftover Easter eggs and singing 'now you're just somebody that I used to blow'
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I FOUND THE LEGS
On another note, I almost lost one side of my fake butt. Dancing the wobble with the fake butt isn't recommend.
Randomize
