Do you think people stop being hipsters when they're naked? because that's what my research shows.
I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Ah, the precious few moments between when i wake up and when i realize why i'm sleeping on a treadmill.
Our dealer is pledging my frat. When he come to sell me weed I make him take out the garbage.
He made me a "booty call of the year" award.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
Just casually ripping a bowl in the chicken coop, with the chickens. NBD
Def just threw up beer then brushed my teeth with some randos toothpaste now back to drinkin beer
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
This is why I only drink in places with a C or D health rating
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
I woke up on the green space outside our dorm cradling a watermelon and sucking my thumb. College is crazy man.
Apparently I have a "problem" because I enjoy doing bong rips in the shower
I am so so sorry I bit your butt last night. Twice.
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
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