she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
is it bad that i have made the decision to never travel to vienna simply because of that transvestite that won the bachelor?
dont start drinking without me
You showed the cops outside of the bar your boobs and then decided to go apologize to them. They admitted that the reason they hung out there was because of girls like you.
love being home for thanksgiving just had grandma pick me up from the frat by her house
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
just walk of shamed past a man riding a bike. RIDING A BIKE. what a wholesome life he must lead.
Should we pre-order food to the ER for cinco de mayo?
Food lion is just a portal. Cheetos are the goal. Its like not banging a super hot chick cause she is french. She still has the same parts just from a different box.
Now I am going to fly my toy helicopter in the dark.
Please never let me the drunk fat dancer in the bus girl
I fucking give up. OKC is where small penises go to disappoint me.
I can't find a song to express how gay I'm feeling.
did I ever tell you about my gay jesus theory?
I still blew him because I won't let allergies keep me from doing what I want. But I almost suffocated like 10 times.
I think you threw up on me last night but i can't remember so i'm not mad at you.
All I could think about was how many vaginas had been on the toliet that I was pukin in
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