do you have any idea how expensive it is to have the munchies at Disneyland?
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
You do resemble something that has been used as a chew toy.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He texted me saying that his mom found my nuva ring in their jacuzzi filter. I don't think I'm welcome back anytime soon.
And then you'll find yourself a hot chick and leave me behind with nothing but my back fat to keep me company.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
I just got a get of my turf look from a hooker. Apparently, Ninja Turtles T-shirt+Jeans+Flip-Flops=Hooker Gear. Woot.
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
of all the things that should kill me, scurvy wont be one of them
Don't come back. They don't have pants.
Oh god.
God has nothing to do with this.
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
So, do I need to remind you to keep it classy tonight?
No, because if you have to be reminded it isn't classy.
A guy I don't even know just ate me out on a washing machine at a random persons afterparty. I came as it was going through spin cycle.Just kept thinking "who does laundry during a party?"
I am no longer and illegal Moonshiner. I just made thousands of gallons of incredibly High test alcohol with police watching and waiting for thare couple of jugs so that they can bring home and disinfect their houses with it. I'm fat with money at the moment.
Randomize