super hot butfun
Oops. What a difference a comma and a space make.
So he sent me a text that said "say hi to your vajayjay for me"
Was there any message he wanted you to relay to your asshole?
i wanna have a kid now so by the time he's 20 ill only be 42 and assuming im already divorced we can pick up girls together
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
I should start handing out wavers before I have sex with someone. 1. Do you have anything to do tomorrow? 2. Are you ok with sleeping 12 hours from exhaustion. 3. Are you ok with a limp?
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
just walked across campus with a bottle of champagne in between my boobs. night two and the quest for classiness is already over
I have straight up perfected the art of amazing manicures with shaky-as-fuck adderall hands. Also, I'm way too proud of this.
We left the bar and you kept yelling "ONWARD SCION, TO GLORY!!"
i don't know what body building stuff he's on, but his cum is basically a 5 hour energy shot.
A shark bit my leg in the Gulf of Mexico well me and the T were banging so look for it in the papers
Randomize
