We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
just cuze she's 16 doesn't mean it's illegal to add her on facebook
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
This does no justice to the amount of paint I'm covered in or the amount of balls I'm tripping.
Look, as a friend I'm asking to see a picture of his tiny dick
Quick question, when did I develop feelings, and how can I make them go away?
That's two questions.
I accidentally told my mom "the reason I didn't answer your call is because my phone was in my pants, on the floor"
i tried giving myself a bikini wax.1. i hate you 2. i think i'm dying
In going to go underground and live with the mole people for a while.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
Holy shit, did you actually CHOOSE to get hit by the alcohol truck last night?
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
i just want to get drunk and cry and have sex with lots of men
she went outside...danced, got some snow, and put cherry vodka in it. she was so proud of herself.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
Randomize
