dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
All I remember is yelling at him to admit he liked Bon Jovi, then accusing him of giving love a bad name.
do you ever facebook stalk someone so much you think their inside jokes are yours?
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
I feel like somebody took my brain out. Stomped on it with cleats. And then put it back together with a glue stick. Thank you.
There are six slides. In going to pee in five of them. You have to guess which one to go down. Agree?
Agreed.
A nice make out session never hurt anyone. Plus he's a pilot, so he'll know the safety procedures for when the night crashes and burns.
the only two hours i was sober on this trip and i managed to break my toe. no one will believe this.
Did you miss the part about my hangover needing a day to rest?
I just saw two homeless guys bond over the fact that they both use Crown Royal bags as wallets in Burger King.
my whole wardrobe smells like substance abuse
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
I feel like we'd have a lot of fun being drunk at a dog show.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
