Friends don't let friends fuck ugly girls. WALK AWAY FROM HER!
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
this isnt the person you just texted but i have her phone. she disappeared when the bacon came home and she hasn't returned since.
Did I ever tell u about how my buddy fucked peter coors's daughter and made a tshirt that said I TAPPED THE ROCKIES with her picture on it?
Dude's from Puerto Rico. Majoring in Spanish is like us majoring in drinking with a minor in watching Forgetting Sarah Marshall.
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
You are a special snowflake. A special snowflake I wouldn't mind rough sex with
I confess. I just downed the bottle of saki. And I'm singing phantom of the opera to the dogs. Be glad you're not here for the high notes.
In light of this week's heat-wave, we are having a house vote tonight on the temporary suspension of the "no smoking indoors" clause. Please bring your voting cards to the living room at 6:30pm
Point of Clarification: by "voting card" we mean a full beer and/or shots
Remember the thing I sent you? "Often complex problems are best solved by thinking like an animal." Hump away!
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
walk of shamed to graduation. ending college with a bang....
My mom's yelling at me for being a whore and my dad's quizzing me on how to drive in winter weather....I'm home!
Randomize
