i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
So i think we're being coned into a threesome with the promise of pokemon
Its a Guy he gets weed for. I'm kinda confused as to why there are going to even be tuxedos involved at all.
I told her we could be friends and she said the last time i told her that we had sex behind a bar at 4am
I'm wearing your poncho, and only your poncho. I'm not getting pulled over like this.
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
I'm concerned that this blind man on the bus has a boner right now
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
Calling a preemptive no homo on tonight's activities
she's just been through a whole lot lately. When the crazy starts leaking out we give her vodka and lock her in the room with all the pillows.
so that's what that room is for...
I just sang beautiful by Christina Aguilera to a kebab. This is what my life has come to.
He told me to take off work and bring a bathing suit. If this doesn't involve six flags hurricane harbor or sex in a hotel pool I'm going to be disappointed.
Well I'm sorry I assumed you were a human and that humans have the capability to forget sometimes.
You wouldn't happen to know why there's an inflatable monkey riding a mattress on my roof would you?
Did my dad just see you doing a walk of shame?
Yup I waved.
Randomize
