And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
I wonder if you could grow some weed in a chia pet
I can't wait to see her breast feed this thing
how the hell did u puke all over the magazines... do u still want me to keep them
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
We were driving to the party as he was giving me key bumps.. That's what I call team work
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
It is 9pm, let the ass parade to the bars begin
Apparently I got mad at you for "Not drinking with me till we thought we were seahorses" and smashed my face on your door. Then I put my feet in the oven and started crying because I was drinking alcohol from a pot. My life is spinning out of control.
I'm resourceful. I forgot we don't have coca cola so now I'm drinking Jack & Dew or Mountain Daniels. Also, I haven't decided on an official name yet for this drink. I'm leaning toward Jack & Dew
either I'm really high or that last bong rip tasted like christmas
Can you bring me some underwear? I feel uncomfortable going underwear less at a Remembrance Day ceremony.
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
you walked into the party, and all you had on was your left sock... literally.
Randomize
